Most of us may not realize it, but we all possess an inherent tendency to mirror behavioral patterns, gestures, words, and phrases of people we are close to. Mirroring usually happens automatically between people who know each other well. Good friends, spouses, and often, small children will use the exact words or phrases and adopt the same gestures, particularly when they’re together.
We can also consciously practice mirroring to build rapport with others because it plays a vital role among the elements of communication. What makes mirroring an exciting topic to explore is when you adopt another person’s verbal and non-verbal behaviors in subtle ways, it can make you seem more likable. And when you are agreeable, it helps you connect and bolster your bonds with other people.
Read on to know more about what is mirroring and the ways to use mirroring effectively in communication.
If you are someone who is looking to use mirroring as a way to strengthen your relationships, you need to be aware of the risks involved. There is a fragile line between healthy mirroring and being downright manipulative. Called out for being manipulative can have disastrous consequences in your career and personal life. Therefore, you must be aware of the best ways to approach mirroring and avoid pitfalls.
Beneficial ways to use mirroring
Professional managers, entrepreneurs, and successful corporate executives often use mirroring to connect and engage more deeply with their clients, customers, and colleagues. Here are three basic steps to be aware of professional mirroring plays out.
- Non-Verbal Mirroring
It would be best if you began with non-verbal mirroring. It is the ground that you lay before you express other mirroring cues. It can be used if you wantto give the other person your complete attention.Start by directly facing the other person. If it is a business meeting, pick the right seat and face toward them.Maintain good eye contact. This will demonstrate your interest level through your undivided attention.A frequent nod as you are listening goes a long way in mirroring their thoughts. When you nod, you agree with what the other person is saying, which builds an immediate connection. - Vocal Mirroring
Mirroring is not just mimicking physical actions but also each other’s voices. It involves maintaining the same pitch, pace, and volume of the other person’s speech.
If they talk fast and loudly, you may need to increase your volume and animation. If people are methodical, slow, and more relaxed, match them at this level instead. - Communication Style Mirroring
Quite different from vocal mirroring, this is a crucial step that involves identifying and adapting yourself to the other person’s communication style. People who are results-driven usually get straight to the point. You must refrain from stretching your introductions or making pointless remarks.Some have an emotional approach and spend time establishing an affinity before getting to the point. Stay calm and warm up to the discussion, even if you are impatient.For those who are rational and focus on figures and data, don’t give long winding explanations. If you realize the other person likes to take a humorous, light-hearted approach to a discussion, match it. Such a person is unlikely to appreciate a severe tone devoid of humor. But exercise caution in the use of puns and flippant remarks.
A final word of caution
Mirroring only works on a subliminal level. The essential point is to ensure both parties are relaxed and open for a mutually beneficial discussion. It would be best if you never tried to fake it by pretending to be interested when you are not. You will almost certainly be found out and end up creating an awkward moment. Do not try to mirror negative body language; you will end up with conflicting stances. And be natural, do not stress yourself out. Remember, if you are keen to learn suitable mirroring, enroll in a personality development course that teaches mirroring.
